The source isn't important, and the context in which it was spoken isn't important, but the statement was.
"Emily... I just don't understand why gorgeous girls like you fall for shit like David put you through."
It's a simple statement, one that I've heard several times before... but it took this time, this person, for the idea to hit home. Why DO pretty girls fall for assholes? Assholes who use the same shitty lines on girl after girl to get them to fall fast and fall hard.... and watch things fall to shit.
Don't misinterpret what I'm saying, in no way do I mean that men, in general, are assholes. In no way do I mean that men are "out to get" innocent girls, always standing by innocently, always the victim. Without a doubt, those would BOTH be very false statements.
Ladies... we are idiots. Don't take it personally, because I'm lumping myself in right alongside all of you... but it's true. We're idiots. We buy into lies, we allow ourselves to fall for the first boy that tells us our hair looks nice, or that we look pretty... a guy that promises you the world, right? Says he'll never hurt you.
But you know what? He will.
Only a man can honestly admit that there will come a day that you might get hurt. Not that he's out to hurt you, but you might get hurt by something he said, or a mistake he made... only a man can say that he will make mistakes. If you can't handle that, then you shouldn't be in a relationship.
I know I talk a lot about overcoming obstacles that are placed before us in life with dignity and grace. I know I talk about how important it is to have self value and self esteem, because all ya'll are beautiful. I know I tell everyone to not let what other people say bring you down... and that no one can make you feel like shit unless you allow their words to dig beneath your skin. But that shit isn't easy.
It's hard to keep your head held high when everyone around you is trying to bring you down, whether with words or by what they do.
Trust me, I've heard my share of "information" about who I am, so to speak. I've heard it all, that I'm down to Earth, that I'm smart, that I'm someone that any man would be lucky to spend the rest of his life with... but conversely, I've heard that I'm a whore, that I'm a serial cheater, that I will sleep with ANYONE because I slept with David first.... I've heard it all, and it's not pretty.
To further this point... I AM down to Earth, and yes, I am of average intelligence, but I do make more mistakes than I should. I do stupid things, say stupid things, and make stupid assumptions.
And YES, it took me a while, but I can say with full confidence that I am someone that any man would be lucky to spend the rest of their life with.
And yes, I made some mistakes. Yes, I fell for David's tricks, and got caught in his trap... but that does not make me dirty, or less of a woman. No, I never cheated. No matter what shit you're going through, it's not okay to betray someone like that.
BUT all of that does NOT make me a slut. I would love to say that people can think what they want, and I won't let it bother me... but truth be told, it does. It DOES bother me when I hear that people think that I'll sleep with them, by just looking at me or hearing rumors. It DOES bother me when I am ridiculed for the mistakes I made in the past. It bothers me when I try hard to keep myself going, and every one around me wants to bring me down...
... but I'm still here! And I know now that I can say this...
LADIES (and gentlemen, I suppose): DO NOT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS THAN THE BEST.
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.
YOU ARE SMART.
YOU ARE FUNNY.
Don't let anyone convince you otherwise... ESPECIALLY yourself.
If you don't believe in you, why should anyone else?
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